Hooray for Dial Up

Dial up. Ah yes, in the continuation of my previous blog about the taken-for-granted conveniences, high-speed Internet access is not a given. Absent from the St. Croix market are corporate big boys, such as Verizon and Comcast. Satellite television and Internet access through Dish; for example, is available at a cost, a much higher cost than stateside. Dishes are purchased out-right by the subscriber at a cost of $400-$600. A satellite service representative on island advised me that because of satellite positioning, two dishes would be required to access all channels. Seems St. Croix is betwixt ping points.

This curious position reminds me of a television commercial of my youth produced by the local celebrity Red Holland. Red hosted and starred in a show for outdoor sport enthusiasts aptly titled “Outdoors with Red” that aired every weekend and daily in the wee hours of the morning on WTVY, the ‘voice of the wiregrass.’ Typically, Red shot his own sponsorship commercials, too. In hawking satellite systems (a brand new product at the time), Red held an oversized galvanized washtub above his head and yelled, “Come on in, satellite!” pivoted 90 degrees and yelled “Come on in satellite!”

Since Dish equipment costs outweigh the enjoyment I receive from viewing and surfing and I learned at a tender age that washtubs on the roof are not a sound source of television reception (much less high-speed Internet), I went with plan B (line-of-sight wireless), then C (antenna on the roof wireless), then D (DSL) which was only partially successful resulting in Dial Up. Our house is located in a canyon and until upgrades on local towers are implemented, no reception is available. The DSL available in our area proved so popular that no more space exists on the modem. Pending modem upgrades, subscribers are offered dial up. Of course there are hot spots on island. I have checked email adjacent to the Carambola Golf Course, outside Paint N Things in the Gallows Bay Shopping Center and while waiting at the airport. After a month of exercising my Internet options and coming up with only one option, I’m relieved to check email in the privacy of my own home rather than the paint store parking lot. Dial up is really not that bad, not a slow as you may remember. My colleagues, Chuck and Gus, prefer it as well.

I wish to goodness that Red Holland had a website to link to, but all my searching has come up with nothing except some Alabama transplant in New Jersey inquiring about where to find copies of the show and waxing nostalgic about "the chicken song" and a Florida sport fishing poll that had Red's show rated as #8 in a list about 30 of viewers' favorite shows. I think everybody in the panhandle voted. Here's a link to his former station WTVY.